Coming Home

Dear Mrs., Mr., Miss, or Mr. and Mrs. Daneeka:
Words cannot express the deep personal grief I experienced when your husband, son, father or brother was killed, wounded or reported missing in action.

-Catch-22, Joseph Heller

I recently saw an advertisement for this show:

I feel very reserved about this. It's a mixture of the happy mood of it and the additional hollywood touch of a "surprise" homecoming.

Why a surprise homecoming? Is a regular homecoming not dramatic enough? Is there not enough drama in one returning back after months away from family? Why do they feel the need to turn it into a reality-show/oprah winfrey-esque moment?

And then there's the happy, feel good-ness of the whole show. It perpetuates the myth of war by omission. Something tells me Lifetime doesn't want to share with its viewers stories of those who couldn't make it home, or those who return home with scars, emotional and physical.

Photo by Todd Heisler, Rocky Mountain News

If you feel that this picture is anti-war, then you fail to understand what happens in a war. And what happens in war is far uglier than the dignified end we try to confer upon those who died. Whether one supports or despises the war, as always we must remember that there is a human cost.

...bullets fly and soldiers die and it's such a shock.

Fuck that. What did they think it was gonna be like? Fear factor?"

-Capt. Stone (Woody Harrelson), The Messenger

I'd like to close by recommending two alternate views of homecoming.

The first is War Tapes, which more candidly follows the tours of three National Guardsmen, including their homecoming. It is a far more realistic portrayal than the fantasy of bursting out of presents or dressing up as a knight. For some, there isn't even anyone to greet them ("Where's the spot for losers with no family?" one soldier quips). And after the return home is the adjustment to civilian life.

Taking Chance follows the return home that over 5,000 families have had. And while it is a definitely American film, I still recommend it in that it largely eschews politics and it tells a story that many people never hear about.

Edit: I also wanted to recommend "the Messenger", which follows a fictional account of those who deliver words no person ever wants to hear.

How do you feel about the war media and shows like "Coming Home"? Do they serve a purpose? Are they exploitive? Are they harmless entertainment?